I feel yuck

I knew it, i always feel sick after drinking nescafe canned drinks, it makes you wanna puke mon. Ahhh...i did my hw due the coming thursday, Ooh i feel a huge relief. but there's still more to do tho, i hv an exam comin up this saturday, i better study. OOsshh..but for some bloody reason, i ain't so nervous about it nor am i super confident about it, im just aite with it. Just go with the flow mon. I don't think any of my friends are gonna study for it, who cares tho, i'll study for it and be the special one. I mean i have extra time so make use of it.
i feel sick. ima bounce. off now

life is full of crushes::

Ahh kim gary..the place..the resto..im seriously getn sick of it. I know i don't eat there often, but i go there very often and seriously the food is good but so i duno, too tasty i would say? its like so tasty u get sick of it, like how we get sick from eating a fat chocolate cake, like that yup. It didn't go to well as my first meal of the day. I miss my sisters and best friends now. GOd..i really do. Sometimes you need family, sometimes you need friends. But i consider my two siblings my friends, friends i go home to, friends i hang around with, friends under the same roof. But my best friends, yeah they are my best friends cuz we've been thru good and bad times, small arguments, we've been stupid together, we know each other quite deep down to the bone. But i guess i do keep my own personal secrets compartmentalized with our usual chittychatchats. I just cant help it, im quite the secretive shit. But im slowly opening up to mbok jamu and mas Jj, and tinoz. Oh god tino looks so pretty now, she lookss like halle berry, real hot ay. Im not saying she wasn't preetty, she was always biyutipul, but now she's much more outstanding. I feel like eatin tuna now..but wtf its like 3:35 am..forget feeding me tummy..im gonna feel so yuck about it. ahh my taste in guys are slowly changing. I don't have a specific type. i guess to me it is when you just feel chemistry between the both of you, he does funny things unintentionally and shit like that. I just figured i fall for guys that make me laugh, guys that are wise..yeah so far das all i got to share. oh wait and mysterious guys..ahhh...its nice sometimes, i hate guys that talk to much as if theyre the shit, but seriously they aren't the shit, they're just full of it. Also guys with no future, no life, ahh fuck em. they should just stay at home cuz das where they belong. I want someone successful, someone proper, someone filled with future prospects. Those are the smart ones, those are the HOT ones. Mbok jamu were talking about our x crushes, who we used to have crushes on way back in old school land. I remember having a crush on jase, oh god..thank god we have nothing between us now, we just buddies yo. haha. I used to have a crush on so many other dudes..but oh well those were just momentary ones, serious ones are the ones now. like i seriously think that my crushes possibly can turn into LIKE in no time. Ahh...i want heineken..i want bali..i want friends..i want a fling..i demand all those things. all those things, once i have it, it will reset my life as a teenager..refresh me. I guess i'll wake up and act like a true adult. haha nah fuck i won't. just talkin shitz ere. i wanna shroom so bad, i wanna take it with don, mur, and abs. ahh..terrific...hope the master plan will work out. haha i remember when mur got drunk after the total knock out drink, it killed her..and left me SOBER for a reason, yeah well to take care of her. haha..i wanna see that bitch die on drinks again, its so entertaining!
my dreams callin me...the only way to meet it is sleep. thats what im doin now.
love off.

clubsevon

Ahhh...gila man my muscles are like fuckin aching big time rite now. its 3:48am, just arrived home from clubtujuh, ihh....played pool for 5 fuckin hours, was suppose to meet bernie tapi cancelled cuz he was stuck in Shah Alam. Nevermind that, i played with Michael the entire night and i beat him around the first half, tapi he killed me the 2nd time around, as well as the other rounds. ahhh i needa practice, i need to play someone challenging so i will actually be considered a challenge. If only. But fuck my arms hurt, its like my muscles are contracting, my whole body is affected bad. waduh.....i need a massage bad. anyone don't mind massagin me? i seriously will get a massage from anybody at this point..desperate..need it bad. i think im gonna go to a spa sooner or later, just have to pamper myself a lil. For some reason, Mike always thinks i hate him or have this thing against him, i mean i seriously don't..he's like one of my closest friends in college, and i enjoy his company. But he told me i was actin weird today and i don't feel a damn thing. Ahh sometimes i don't know what type of face i put on. when i was smiling, he told me to smile cuz i looked so furious. so i was like heh? that shit dont' make sense mon. I can't wait to move into me new plc...im so malesh to move the barang tho...well cuz my whole bodys aching now. but yeah well...still lazyyyyy. I put like twooooooooo big tiger plasters on, one on my armand the other, my back. argh...sakit oowee. I dont know wut my plans are today..but i know it'll be just plain normal.
peach out.
hoho..

finally!!!!!!!!!!

Oh finally i finished that fuckn website! Shit man 6 pages,but still it was full of pics and contents plus the linking was fuckd up. Anyways im late for class, hopefully eric will still be there by 5. gotta beat time man...but the couples bathing...cmon come out come out..drip dry drip dry. Ahh im gonna get some real sleep tonight, i haven't been sleepin that much for the past 2 weeks, i feel like total shit. Shit a black cat just looked at me with its eyes...damn it looks like one of those sinbad creatures with those glowing eyes. Even in broad day light it glows. Well nice eyes..but its so scary. Well anyways, i need my beer,i deserve my heineken, been workin too damn hard these days, honest! It's the hardest i've worked since highschool. But of course i was more rajin in highschool, life was a lil restricted. Not much of clubbing or anything....yeah practically it. i miss clubbin with don and stuff...the girls night out we used to have all the time...ahh nice. i guess i need that. But right now i need a foot massage, need it bad.
anyways, i'm going to leave right now. needa hand in stupid website.

missin all. :(

I miss the power of love, daun hijauku. hehe...fatten me up.
i miss wiwieds roti bakar coklat-keju +es teh tawar
i miss critiques thrown both ways at me, at them, evveryone mon.
i miss getting the superman fly...oh the old superman story.
i miss cough syrups....natural dose of tranqsi wanna partay and blow my whistle bitch!
i miss drunkness, its been a while since we've met.
i miss ernie's laughter, krispys impersonations, the hot tukang sate's fc, bang jj's retarded sense of HUMOR!
I miss cibun, i demand a reunion...it'll be funny...we'll all be certified clubbers by then compared to what yall were like back in highskoo...party shitters ay.
Nasi padangku, come to me! my chilli made outta 1/4 cannabs. addictive.
i miss passn the trans', flashin their everythings, they aint' lookin too good. mebe we should flash em back!
i miss citos, tempat anak gaul...but who gifs mon..we're gaul kan..hehe
i miss partayin mon, routine on weds, lets claim our free champagne n vodk's from centro, get fuckd...trus go to manna L and ruin da massive speakospeaker.
i miss izzi pizza, gimme em izzi dough balls. delicius!
i miss havin ze crumbles for ze crumbs.i miss xmas, fav auspicious event.
Gramps i miss you, we'll have our cup of tea, ill visit, janji....
Bali i miss you, u overcome boredom and you make drinkin bintangs during sunny afternoons fuckin fun!
I miss usin da "drip dry, drip dry" and "two times bitch" n "burritos!" phrase. crazy/beautiful inc.
i miss bubur ayam rumah sakit pondok indah...
i miss my sweetest tabooo....
I miss pancakes n hersheys..give me the magical whip.whippo.
i miss takin photobox pictas...miss gettin tortured by that song.ahh.
Where's my perfect drug huh? dont tell me i lost you. i did didn't I.
Shooting stars.reload n fire across the darkness, so i can make a wish on behalf of the things ive missed.
im missin you. im missing all. i ran out of it bad.
-whooosh out-

keep goin till you hit the spot..whoa.

bloggie blog,
im tired, exhausted, sweating like shit, seriously moody, pissed, frustrated, doing my assignments, but its not enuf, lecturers demand more from us, das all i can give, i've been doing the group projects myself, its seriously tiring....now we're printin it out. ahh..i hate dreamweaver..its such a slow software to make stupid websites, mendingan frontpage dong.
Yay i called Martin in canada last night...fuck that dude...sombong buanget, finally i discovered that he's still alive! can't wait to see him man! Going to deliver the good news to mur, like she would care? i guess she's forgotten about him already, only I, the unforgetful one..cieh...keep in touch with him. Haha i have his pic where he looks terribly obese, compared it to highschool pics..damn hilarious man. We went to yamcha in Rafi's...and then went to KimG's for the honeylemon shit, trus got home, did assignments, dcided we needed a break, then chilled in darus. love that plc. And i saw a fuckin hot guy...uggh...he's not hot..he's just i duno...attractive, like really attractive. ahh..fuck it mon.
Okay whatever, class is awaiting. But im just too damn lazy, still goin thoz..
cya lata

Just a phase

The song -scar- reminds me of Danny. I had a fuckn argument with him a few days ago and it was horrible, he was selfish, normally we have this makin up thing in the end, but this time i was strong enough to resist him and dart home. He deserved it, no matter what we shared in the past, i guess it doesn't exist to me anymore. Naw im just saying that, i can't forget ppl that easily. Yeah feelings still there, what to do. But i like this other dude better than him, waaaaaaay better than him, only cuz dan and i used to go out, thats why that little something is still there. But i don't get whats so special about him, i hate having feelings for people when you don't know why you have feelins for em, the answers just i duno...no idea...etc. errr.....feel like aiming a bazooka straight to his face mon. Fuckn annoying.

Lyrics to scarrrr..

Chorus:I tear my heart open, I sow myself shut. My weakness is that I care too much.My scars remind me that the past is realI tear my heart open just to feel
Drunk and I'm feeling down and I just wanna be alone
I'm pissed cause you came around Why don't you just go home
Cause you channel all your pain and I can't help to fix myselfYour making me insane
All I can say is
ChorusI tried to help you once A kiss will only viseI saw you going downBut you never realizedThat your drowning in the water. So I offered you my hand Compassions in my nature
Tonight is our last dance

ChorusI'm drunk and I'm feeling downand I just wanna be aloneYou shouldn't ever came aroundWhy don't you just go home?Cause your drowning in the water and I tried to grab your handand I left my heart openbut you didn't understand.but you didn't understandYou fix yourselfI can't help you fix yourselfBut at least I can say I triedI'm sorry but I gotta move on with my own lifeI can't help you fix yourselfBut at least I can say I triedI'm sorry but I gotta move on with my own lifeChorus x2

sleepy

Blog,
im sleepy but i can't sleep and im chatting with justin, another justin not the cibun justin. anyways....i finished my assignment, but i still have loads more to do. have to wake up later on and complete it all. ahhh if only i was a nerd, i would have the motivation. Been too lazy, trus tadi siang i got scolded by my lecturer, isssh....i know im in trouble,but its only cuz i had to go all the way down to jb for the funeral. he wouldn't believe me gitu. jadi...yeah cuz he scolded me, i asked him to warn me more so i would be motivated. and i just finished my project, took me hours. I need the same determination i had a few hours ago for like the rest of the month. i miss me mumsy, wanna get her to bitch at my lecturers for me.
anyways peace out dude,
now im tired.

please kiss my ass. serious.

Dunt know what da fucks up with the title, but i seriously don't know what mood i am in right now. Fuck my projects man, how could they cause me such stress and pain. My bodys aching and i can barely breathe right. I need my friends, i miss watching movies in the bioskop, especially all those action to horror films, even romantic comedies, which i'm slowly losing taste in. I just watchd this film called DEBs, bought the dvd, its pretty cheesy....but my idols there, devon aoki..haha but anyways she doesn't look too good in it.
i'm ditcin my project, its due wednesday anyway, duno why i was doing it in advance anyway. I still have to do some web technology,d ue this thursd. But yay finished my scrapbook for moral studies,yknow stupid values people don't use in this god forsaken country. uggh. my internet is seriously getn me pissed..but im too lazy to show that im pissed. No ones at home, i woke up from a pretty long nap and poof....everyones gone, they left me and their all having dinner. i wish someone called me at this point of time, why cant someone call me and ask me out to dinner..so i can eat...so i can talk...so i won't be bored. my only companion now is dunhill menthol and marl lights menthol. both menthols. i guess menthols my companion. Im moving to my new plc in a few weeks, to be approx 3 weeks...yesh! Finally moving into a new plc...ground floor, id consider it a small house..but its a groundfloor condo. haha. facing the lake view juga bo. haha that word bo, or expression reminds me of abhi. Now i'm watching csi-miami...tis pretty good, ny is better. I duno mebe the crime scene investigations there are just more thrilling, plus they got better technology, more updated. ahhh....i miss danny right now....in a way i regret breakin up with him...i guess all my relationships are like this..but still im askin...why do i miss him, i didn't expect to miss him the slightest bit, but what am i doin now. Missin him. I miss his humor..i miss everything about him, especially his aftershave...yum..it makes me wanna kiss him. im trying to make it to prom, but i duno when my school hols end. And i don't wanna stay in jkt too long, don't wanna get myself bored...but i do miss it alot. i wonder whether we'll ever have a reunion in the future, i really am lookin forward to that. Okay anywyas im off. watching lost now...fuck the guys so sexy!

dear u

Hey blog,
ive been fine i guess...been busy attending my grandpas funeral and well that was pretty sad. But i don't know how to put it into words...it was just sad and happy altogether. I miss him so much tho.....it sorta hurts in a way, haven't felt this way before. i cried when i received the phonecall, but well during the funeral, i was completely alright, didn't wanna cry, it wasn't worth the tears cuz i should be happy for him. I am.
Anyways i've got projects to do.......stuff to complete....have to cope up for the whole week of bolosing..ya udah deh...better cabut now.