Wednesday, March 02, 2005

oh that "fly"

haha..i finally paid that dumbass jase a visit! haah it's so weird being in singapore with this dude, he got black yo, like fuckn black! hahah..its hilarious. Like i couldn't spot him and suddenly i turned around and this burnt nose baldy comes darting my way and it took me a few seconds to familiarize with him or should i say it,he looks like a creature. hehe..maaf jase. The whole time i was the one annoying him, like pinching him here and there and trying to mess up his bushy eyebrows, hahahahha..theyre so hairy. Torture torture.
Jb was fun, got to see my grandpa recovering in bed, my grandma blowing her birthday candles, just the right timing i guess. I've been having loads of beer these days, iihh i feel fuckin bloated. Uni is alright, i won't say it sux, cuz it actually doesn't. Oh god, i'm not sure if i want a relationship now, i'm so confused with who and whether i should accept em. LIfe is a big ass. I've been listening to buddha bar music, so soothing and relaxing, it's perfect for meditation. I dont' meditate daily, i just do it when i'm so frustrated and it works, sort of. I'm paying attention more to my needs these days, what would make me a better person. And i admit, i am a failure in my love life and i guess the regular, but i don't want to entirely improve myself, i just want to be slightly better, which means i have to really feel what others feel in order to know how hurt they are before blaming them for their actions. I'm listening to "my immortal" now, i forced myself to isolate it for a few months and then let my ears listen again, i appreciate it more. I guess absence makes the heart grow fonder, that's why i choose to miss someone so much and then really give em a nice meaningful hug after. But i guess it would be quite tough for me, sometimes i miss people so easily i just feel like huggin em and hanging with em forever. My manhunt is coming in an hour i guess, i already know the results but theyre nice to look at so yeah. Oh fuck i have moral studies besok, yuck....it finishes at 8pm, fuck it mon, so tiring.
haha let me tell you about my wine experience yesterday, it was a major disaster. My flight was around 9ish and i got heavily tipsy before that, so yeah i was practically scrolling around the airport like a walking zombie, i was scary. I don't know what type of white wine they served, but if im not mistaken it tasted like conoisseur..i duno how to spell it, i guess its like 20 percent above, so i was doomed, fuckd actually. It was funny cuz i started cursing so much in my head, i started criticizing my uncle and stuff, of course it wasn't that bad, not obvious, i don't want to exaggerate, but writing is writing, you tend to exaggerate a liil much more cuz you can't seem to find words to make it simple, and im telling you what i went thru lastnight was not simple. Well like i said i was fucked and as well as flying on the floor, that's how it felt..but the feeling was nice. I fell asleep in the plane and as soon as i woke up, myhead was pounding bad. No one bothered to help me cuz i looked so cranky. You know what? I think i'm a weaker person now, i mean i miss those good old days when i wouldn't fall for guys that easily, now when the convos are nice and everythings running smooth, i'll just totally have the crumbles for him. I hate having instant crushes, it's so distracting. haha. I don't know what im talking about. pardon me.
I haven't read a book for a long time, i've just been sticking to national geos and readers digest, i plan to read the "living history of hillary rodham clinton" again cuz the lastime i read it, i was in a stage of adaptation, haha...meaning i was trying to adapt to uni and shit like that, so i didn't really get Hillary's whole point there.
I miss ice-cream! I'm definitely gonna treat myself to some haagen dazz again, i want baileys irish cream. I wanna go to zouk bad, not on a thurs though, probs on a friday or saturday when trans is on, trans is better for me now, i like that hyperness. Hip hop is really old school for me now, but well sometimes it's fun to dance to.
Okay well blogg, i'm leaving you for manhunt...soz man.
gnite..sweet dreams.
i pray for one of my cartoon dreams...ahhh..it's heaven. :P